The Na’vi Babyfur Diaspora: An Open Letter To James Cameron


Kaltxì ‘eylanay
(Hello, friend)

My birth name is Nathan, but my friends, myself, and anyone who really knows me calls me by my true name: Atan´eko. It is my hope that you will know me as such, and help me with a problem that myself and many other Na’vi face.

Avatar

In the winter of 2009, I saw a film that forever changed my life. I remember how I felt in the theater the first time I saw your masterpiece, Avatar. Like many people, I sat there behind my 3d shades and said to myself, “this is me. This is who I am.” By the will of Eywa and you, Mr. Cameron, I had finally found myself after 16 years of feeling like a complete outcast – a drifter – a man without an identity. I knew I belonged on Pandora, and I knew, in my heart, that I was a Na’vi.

Prior to that point in my life I didn’t have many friends at all. I knew that I was a babyfur, but after sampling several otherkin identities, something still just felt off. For several years I was a dragon. Another year after that it was a Charizard. Finally settling as a bat-iguana hybrid I had all but given up hope that anything but my diapers would fit right in my life. Then you changed everything.

Avatar was so much more than a movie to me. Heck, to everyone! I mean really, if it was “just a movie” as my pop likes to say, how is it possible that it made so much money? The film grossed more than the GDP of some nations! That’s enough to make Pandora real in my mind, and I have a lot of Na’vi friends who would agree. I’m sure you would agree too, Mr. Cameron, and that’s why, as a spiritual child of yours, I am desperately asking for your help.

The Na’vi language – a language that is surely fully-formed and completely functional on it’s home-world in Pandora – is little more than a patchwork of basic grammar rules and common phrases among the Na’vi diaspora. We communicate in our native tongue as much as we can, and as functional as the language is for diapo-normal Na’vi, the babyfur Na’vi community is at a complete loss. Certain words are of absolute necessity for our communication, and only one person has the power to infuse our dwindling community with the necessary jargon to continue our way of life. That one person is you, James Cameron!

Remember: the Na’vi are all about balance – were not asking for a whole new dictionary here, just a couple of key phrases so we can make Earth feel a little bit more like home. So, it is without further ado that I present to you this list of words in need of translation:

  1. diaper 
  2. daddy (not like father, daddy in the adult baby sense)
  3. adult baby
  4. ‘pankin.
  5. tinkle
  6. whoopsie
  7. “I’m not a pedophile. This is consensual sex between two adults.”

If you could take time out of your very busy schedule at the bottom of the Ocean to please help us, we will be forever grateful to you, our father, Mr. James Cameron!

Irayo!

To anyone that wishes to help our cause, please tweet #navidiaper to @JimCameron and ask for his help!

One Comment

  1. Neytiri

    Kaltxì Atan’eko,

    accidentally I came across this article and I thought maybe I can help you. I don’t know James Cameron, but I know a lot about Na’vi and their language. Some of this words you wanted to know, I can give you.

    Unfortunately there is no word for “diaper”. because Na’vi don’t use something, not even the babys of them. But maybe they will understand, when you say: I use a loincloth for going to the toilet (Oel sar tewngit fte fngä’) I think this must be right.^^
    In Na’vi they have a word for father -sempul- and daddy -sempu-. I hope you meant this. Telling the Na’vi that you are an adult baby is more difficult. I think -fyeyn prren- should be the same than adult baby.
    I don’t know exactly what you meant with ‘panking, maybe spanking? I’m sorry, I’m from germany. But if you meant this, as far as we know Na’vi don’t have a word for this. They just have a word for “hit” which means -tabuk-.
    Well tinkle and whoopsie, this words they don’t have. They just use one word for going to the toilet -fngä’- and I think they don’t use it very often. ;)
    And the last sentence … I have to say, that Na’vi don’t know the word “pedophile”. They don’t even know what it means, so they wouldn’t think something like this from you. But I wanted to translate it anyway for you.
    (Oe kel lu “pedophile”. Oel sar tewngit fte fngä’.) I guess this must be right too.

    Hope I could help you a little bit. ^_^

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